Try harder.
The lovely beans on toast meal I referenced in a previous post. My daughter made the meal.
“I’m just trying my best” is a common line and one that is used by parents also. As Matt Walsh says and yes I do occasionally listen to him, there is a difference between actually doing your best and claiming you are doing so. None of us are prone to being defensive and sometimes we could actually be doing a better job or we could be a better person. Acknowledging this is to understand what is in our grasp.
Despite the media preaching via its “documentaries,” that even with two good parents, toxic masculinity still made their son a murderer. (I refer to the Adolescence debacle). Despite the absolving of responsibility that narcissist parents use, there is such a thing as actions and consequences. What you put in, you will get back but not in ways that suit any egotistical desires. Instead, your child will become their own person but if you have been a good parent, which like Matt says is not difficult, then you’ll have raised a good adult. It is only the odd time this does not happen, as in the case of extraordinary circumstances and severe personality disorders.
Being a perfect parent is impossible, says Matt. Being a good parent is not and it is never too late to step it up. Because if you don’t take responsibility now and if you don’t acknowledge your bad behaviours, your child will definitely let you know about it in some way or another. We all reap what we sow.
Thank you for reading.
You are doing a great job - keep it up!
As you say, being a good parent is not hard. Being present, consistent, fair, honest, having a sense of humour, giving firm boundaries, allowing your kids to make mistakes, encouraging independence whilst providing the support they need etc etc etc. Oddly, the hardest part for me has been my reaction when my daughter is hurt and upset. I have to be sympathetic whilst trying hard not to allow myself to get dragged under. If she’s miserable, it benefits no one if I’m miserable too. That’s hard, because it breaks my heart when she’s unhappy. Great photo!